Friday, November 23, 2012

I Am Thankful

The younger kids are in the middle of many fevers and lethargy but still enjoyed a family day of snuggling, watching the parade, feasting, being thankful, and playing games. One thing I was thankful for yesterday is that even when we have to cancel our Thanksgiving guests from coming over, to not to spread illness to others, we still have a full house.

Also, I’m thankful everyone felt much better yesterday (on Thanksgiving) than today. Today we have some serious kids down! Sebastian is sleeping like a log. Penelope is pitifully watching TV and Everett is restless on my lap cat napping. I'm glad we got to enjoy Thanksgiving yesterday. I’m also thankful for a sweet husband who heard kids crying last night and got up to say he’d stay up with me. I don’t need him to, I don’t expect him to (I can try to nap during the day -he has to be at work and can't nap or sit on the couch watching cartoons like I can), but it’s sweet and thoughtful and generous that he is sympathetic and wanting to help. I'm ever thankful for him.

It’s been pretty intense the last two nights with Everett. When I get one kid asleep another wakes up. everyone is easy to get back to sleep except Everett. Then if I do get him to sleep a dog starts barking and I have to fly out of bed to quiet him --and it happens ALWAYS just as I start falling asleep. The worst part though is that Everett has either flat out refused to sleep or he is too restless to get comfortable. He's not congested or anything so that's not the problem, he's just not feeling well. Even if I suppress his fever he still doesn't sleep any better.

Even though I'm tired, at the core of it I really enjoy taking care of the kids when they are sick -even though seeing them sick is not fun at all and I'd rather them be well! I'm still thankful though... it's tiring and hard work, but I'm thankful I can stay home with them. I'm thankful we are healthy and get over things easily. I'm thankful I studied a bunch about natural health 16 years go and still use what I learned. I’m dearly, dearly thankful we hardly ever need to see a Dr. (only 2 kids ever have needed to). I’m thankful that I don’t take things like health and family for granted. 

This is the last thing I got to see before going to bed last night. ♥ I was putting sick little kids to be while others were doing this.


These are some conversations/moments from November that I am thankful I wrote down and saved so I don't forget:

It is SO SWEET listening to babies talk. Everett talks so much to all of us now. I just told Penelope to put a coat on if she's going outside and Everett points to the heavy sweatshirt I just put on him and says to me, "Doh-knee-co." (Don't need coat.) Such sweetness, so adorable. He talks all the time now.
~~~~~
Sebastian ate all the soft mints I bought.
Penelope reminded me, "I told you yesterday Sebastian was eating them under the table!"
I asked, "Why Sebastian, WHY AND HOW could you eat all the mints!?!"
Sebastian's reply, "I don't know. I have problems."
~~~~~
Sebastian: Everett do you want to play castle toys with me?
Everett: "Auhh" (means yes)
Sebastian really sweet voice wrapping his arm around Everett as they walk away: "Ok, I promise I'll let you play this time."


This month has also been a bit overshadowed by grief, not mine but of other peoples. I've thought non-stop and helplessly watched on as a friend of a friend lost her two year baby to a terrible accident and as one of my friends watches her husband lose to cancer. Do I become thankful I'm not having that first person heartache? That I only get to grieve for a moment and then am recused from pain because my husband comes home healthy every night and my kids are safely tucked between the walls of our warm home? No, not exactly. What I'm thankful for is empathy, which hurts and sometimes keeps me up at night, but also keeps me grounded and unselfish. I'm also thankful I recognize the strength others have and that I try to learn from people who have no other choice but to be strong, because no one is immune to pain or loss. It finds us all someday in someway. I pray for peace and love in the hearts of those that grieve this holiday season. I hate sadness. 

5 comments:

Molly said...

Is that a Tardis I spy on the chalkboard?!

I've been reflecting recently (again) on how glad I am I blog and why I don't want to give it up--this is a post like that. One that will bring back a whole collection of memories that has slipped from conscious memory. I was looking back at some of my own old posts recently and found the ones I wrote about Pinterest day and it was so much fun to re-read. And...that is only after like six months have passed. It will be even more fun in a couple of years :)

Mom of a bunch of great kids... said...

My older kids are “Who” crazy now! :)

When I started blogging again I decided to write for myself, even though it’s public and I share posts occasionally on FB I make sure it’s for me. I don't write near what I wish I could make time for, but I make an effort to write at least some. I often feel like my kids will get a glimpse of their childhood from this blog and understand so much of what I write about and how I feel when they have their own kids. I used to journal (not on here) every little thing I said and did; everything I thought and anytime I wanted to rant or vent. Not that there is anything wrong with that, it can be therapeutic! At some point what I found is that I didn't care about reading about any of it later. I realized it was boring-nonsense and so unnecessary; except the parts about mothering, parenting, the children themselves and my husband. I’ve had to scour several journals for hours looking for the ‘good stuff’ and cut and paste into drafts what is worth keeping.

When I'm gone someday my kids will have my thoughts and hopefully feel less like I’m gone. I also have a weird big fear of forgetting things (through time, old age and even amnesia)! I like to write so I can re-read my life just in case. Lol. I want to start writing about my marriage and life with Ricky -separate from here- so that I'm inclined to write more about the things we say and do, the fun we have, the disagreements we get into and how we solve them. We do so many thoughtful things for each other and have so much fun while having such a busy crazy kid focused life and I want to remember so much of it. If he passes on before me I don't want to be alone. I want something tangible I can hold and read. I'm very sentimental like that. It's why I write about the kids, I want to have something to read one day when they are different people and not mine anymore. Of course you are very sentimental and love writing so I know you understand. <3
It’s SO great you commented because I was thinking about some of your post, too, and how meaningful they are and will be in the future! You are one of the few people I know who doesn’t want to forget and feels the strong pull to record and harness the memory of pregnancy, babyhood, childhood, parenting, motherhood , Etc. :)

Molly said...

Omg. I have that EXACT fear (or whatever) of forgetting. I write to remember.

I left a comment on this Litarary Mama blog post about it a couple of weeks ago: http://www.literarymama.com/blog/archives/2012/11/why-do-you-write.html

Oh, and I've never thought about it before, but the whiny/neurotic stuff in many of my personal journals is so repetitive. Same old same old. Sometimes I feel bad that I no longer "have time" to keep a daily, personal journal, but you're totally right--what I go back to and I'm happy to have are NOT the feelings, but the *stuff that happened*. And, also again right, I rarely write about Mark. I either write about things the kids did or about myself. I also realize that the older the kids get the harder it is to know what is okay to write without asking their permission. Maybe that is why I don't write much about Mark--kind of that feeling that it is his own business or life or something?! I don't know. I sense some blog posts in my future.

Oh, and one more thing. I swear I have 100 ideas for each post that actually makes it to the page. If I could learn to write shorter posts, I could probably get more of them up there! ;)

Oh wait, one MORE thing...with my own site, I feel like I have to balance between personal memory stuff and other information/education/advocacy because I don't want to OD on the picture of my kids and make people bored. If I was only blogging for myself (and my future memory) I'd make more of the personal picture-type posts, but I start to worry "who cares" and so I put up something educational!

And, speaking of blogging I wish this would let me comment using my real blog and not my defunct blogger blog. BUT at least itis letting me comment! (Luckily I've learned to copy and paste before submitting so that I don't have to freak out about trying several times either! ;)

Molly said...

*BUT, the pictures/personal/kids stuff is NOT boring in other people's blogs or in going back to my own!

Sarah said...

The T.A.R.D.I.S. and "Doctor Who" are so adorable. I'm thankful for Doctor Who this year, too!

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