When we arrived at the Patriot Day Rally we had a few things
to get in order: pie drop off, bounce
house for kids, find some food. After we got our food I was happy the table seating was
taken up because I instead parked us in the grass
next to where the Duggar family was signing autographs and meeting
people. There was a huge line to meet them. Some of their older kids
noticed us as I started spreading out blankets for kids to sit on and as Ricky and I
opened chips and drinks for little kids. I often feel like a busy and satisfied mother hen
tending to my chicks as I'm: wiping faces, making sure they have the
food they will actually eat, helping them with this and that, patting
them on the heads, kissing their cheek and laughing at them... or
telling them to be good/quiet down... or to STOP fighting.
The line to meet the Duggar family got longer and longer. I had not
planned on waiting in line. I went up close to take some photos of
them talking to other people. I just wanted to observe.
As more of the event unfolded the Duggar clan soon took the stage leaving the
line of people on hold. Their kids sang, played violins, played piano,
they talked.
I knew our little kids were going to grow bored so we
headed off to the playground after a while. Jim Bob and
Michelle were telling their life story together which included the
motivation behind having a large family, but I already knew some of those
things. I wanted to make sure my kids didn't get burnt out and bored so I
could listen in later and be there for the winning pie announcement.
Sebastian is at this really frustrating (for us all) 3-4 year old
screaming/angry stage. He's very independent and having trouble
expressing himself and controlling his anger so I try to keep him busy
and unruffled.
We played on the playground and then played
closer to the event. We played duck-duck goose, red light green light
and ran round like crazies. Sebastian screamed over something, I was
worried about him having a meltdown but he was okay.
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| Charlotte's unbaked cherry-raspberry pie |
When it was time
for door prize announcements we moved in closer.
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| my unbaked apple star pie |
|
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|
Yay pie contest was up
first!! Third place was a peanut butter pie, second place they announced was Charlotte! To which I jumped up and down and started yelling,
"This is my 16 year daughter!! She won 2nd!!" I'm sure she was thrilled
at my yelling. Hahaha. Then they announced my name for 1st place. I
jumped up hollering and acting like I was at a pie rodeo. I grabbed
Charlotte by the arm and pulled her up to the front of the podium with
me. All the while I'm yelling, "Mother-daughter won, mother-daughter
won!!" at the top of my excited lungs.
I dorked out. Totally.
And not only did they say I won but they said that my pie was exceptional. I'm so happy!
The lady handing us our ribbons questioned me
with a smile, "Wait, did you say you're mother and daughter?" I proudly
did not hesitate to confirm that fact once again. When we got back to
our seats in the grass some other people asked if we were mother and
daughter too. It was fun. Several people thought it was so neat! We
thought it was pretty great to win together. Charlotte worked so hard on
her pie!
After we collected our other prizes/ gift certificates I realized I
dorked out and Charlotte was sweet and reassured me that it was
okay. She's so cute :) Aunt Sharon had met us at the rally so she got
to see. She was so glad she came and didn't miss it!
It was dark and the little kids were bored,
unfortunately the other fun things closed down. We didn't get to the
mechanical bull ride or rock wall climb in time. It was a bummer. We walked
around the back of the stage area and ended up at the end of the line to meet the Duggar family. I stepped in line and looked at my husband lovingly and asked if
we should wait after all. Charlotte was all for waiting in line and so
were Sage and Ethan. Ricky said sure but we both had the obvious worry
about the younger kids. He took them for a walk to see some emergency
vehicles on display. I strapped Everett into the Ergo baby carrier to nurse and he thankfully fell
asleep. When Ricky came back Sebastian and Penelope sat in the double
stroller and looked bored but tired. It wasn't long until they started
fighting, crying or doing both. It was 8pm and dark. I thought the
fireworks might start and that would be the perfect line waiting
activity, but we found out they didn't start until 9pm. Somehow we
entertained the kids, it was touch and go for a little bit but then things were fine. There were jumbo post cards with the Duggar family on them
that we could get signed. The kids met about five of the Duggar
kids, they were super friendly. They talked and answered questions if
you instigated the conversation. I thanked them for being so nice to
sign autographs and be at the event, they said they loved it.
As I approached Jim Bob and Michelle I gushed
with a big smile and they returned it.
They were just as fantastically
refreshed and happy looking as they were at the beginning of the event.
There is nothing wrong with the picture above, but I'm telling you they look better than this. Charlotte had mentioned earlier how much younger they looked in person,
and it's so, so true! They look great and younger! They beam with
happiness and gratitude for their happy and content lives. They glow
with love for each other. That's what first attracted me to them so many
years ago. As I gushed and told them we wanted a big family and now
have seven kids they were super happy for us. I totally thought
they probably hear that all the time and would be like 'oh yes that's so
nice dear now run along'. But it wasn't like that at all, they were
interested in our kids and us! I thanked them for being an inspiration
to us and that having lots of kids was something we already wanted to do
but were afraid to plunge into. I said, "People think you are crazy
when you have a lot of kids." Jim Bob laughed, "Well it is a little
crazy." :) I laughed back, "Okay, it's actually a lot crazy, but
so wonderful! They said they had to get a picture with our family which
really made me happy. I wasn't going to ask but they jumped right up and
joined our kids in line for a picture. I was so happy they wanted too!
As I introduced Ricky to both of them Jim Bob shook hands with Ricky and
quipped, "There's the good guy." I can totally see Jim Bob
in politics (as he has been) he's very personable and very charismatic.
Jim Bob took the time to ask how old Everett was as he slept in the
Ergo even though Everett had his face hidden.
Michelle commented on my Ergo baby carrier. (Moms bond over Ergos!) She said, "Aren't Ergos the best carriers, we have a few of those."
Nicest
people I've ever met. They had met hundreds of people over the past 4-5
hours and they were that nice to us. I feel like they actually looked at the people they talked to and met.
I
don't care that they believe in somethings I do and somethings I don't.
I don't care they are "extreme." I'm fascinated by them and always have
been. We didn't have a big family because Jim Bob & Michelle did, but
it has sure made me feel better about it at times. Made me feel less alone I guess. When they look
at each other I see how Ricky and I look at each other. When I hear them
talk about children it's how we feel about our children. It was
wonderful meeting such wonderful happy people. I'm amazed they have so
many children and I'm inspired by them in various ways.
Sometime in late 2004 or early 2005, before people knew who they were, I caught a TLC documentary on TV called 14 kids and pregnant again.
Ricky and I had four kids and wanted another couple of kids at least. So this show was a must see for me. I thought four kids was
busy...I couldn't wait to see how a household of 14 ran! This show was
my first TV encounter with the Duggar family and it covered lots of
things I wanted to know:
Why do they only have one closet?
How much do they spend on groceries?
How much laundry do they do every
day? And who does it?
How can they support such a large
family?
How does each child feel about
being a member of such a large
family?
What do they do for fun?
Where does everybody sleep?
Do the kids ever get in fights?
How are conflicts settled?
How do you home school so many
different ages?
I recorded the show and watched it with Ricky
and we found it interesting. It was the first time that I truly believed we could have more kids and be okay. Soon I heard about them on morning shows
and in follow up shows on TLC. I remember telling my husband after we
had Penelope, baby number five, that I had heard 'that family with the
14 kids are up to 16 kids now.' They soon became a household name in our
own home. I enjoyed hearing about their new additions. I recorded
their documentary style TLC shows to show our kids how their big family ran as I struggled to find our own groove and routine. As the laundry and chores at my house piled up I felt like if they could do it so could I. We were also new to homeschooling at that time. The Duggars were the first family with more than five children
that I remember being exposed to. They inspired me and helped me see that we could do what we wanted
to do, which was have more kids because it was what we believed in
and it was the path we felt truly lead to. Their birth control beliefs struck
me as especially interesting because we hold our own unique and in some ways
similar beliefs as well. It didn't matter to us that they are extreme
in their lifestyle. They are who they are and I enjoy the pieces that I
connect with, which is really what we should do with all people.
Their love and commitment for their family, their beliefs, their home
and each other was and still is full of familiar and happy inspiration
for me. I feel like people think they
need to be exactly like each other in order to respect, embrace or
admire one another. The best thing I learned in my young adult years was
that this notion is totally wrong and dangerous.
The saddest thing I discovered is that people love to hate each other. It's all over in our society. When I really opened my eyes to it I saw it everywhere. We all expect our children not to bully each other but our society shows adult bullying and the berating of people all of the time. It's in the news, in our own lives, in celebrity news, on TV and movies. Hate because some one is too fat or thin, too ugly or too beautiful, too outspoken, gay, because of political or religious beliefs. Hate just because. Read the comments at the bottom of news stories and opinion pieces, the hate is thick. Hate is the default emotion of 'I don't agree.' The biggest change I
made over the years was to make doubly sure I didn't hate on others for who they are and that I didn't teach hate to my children. I was already teaching that to my kids but I had to make sure I was living that way. I now try hard to find the
good in people, because it's there. When I started doing that I felt more free because of it. Learning how to do that in a society of bullying and self righteousness takes realization, acceptance, self discovery and at times effort.
In a world where we aren't rallying against abusers and rapists or rioting in the streets over hungry and abused children in our very OWN country, heck in our very own communities, I hold a lot of sadness and disappointment in people who take the time to criticize the Duggar family.
Related topics:
In Defense of the Duggars
The Anti-bully Bullies
The Top 10 Most Bullied Internet Celebrities People just being people, except hateful people band together and decided when people apparently aren't allowed to just be themselves.
Cyber-bullying cripples even celebrities
Cyber / Bullying Statistics
